Monday, August 29, 2022

7.6 Rant

WARNING: SUCIDE CONTENT AND 13 REASONS WHY CONTENT IN FOLLOWING CHAPTER. 


Dear diary,  I'm so worried.. HAM overdosed but is in a coma in the hospital.  Let's start from the beginning






 In our double Homeroom and English and Peer commutations class we were covering the 13 Reasons Why book.    Mrs OJO asked why did Hannah Barker overdosed on drugs instead of using another method.   Madeline said "But I thought she had slit her wrists?"





 That made me go into a rant.   "You watched the Netflix series.  I think it was very, very stupid when they made the show that they chose to have Hannah Banker slit her wrists.  It makes it seem like it was a very-last minute decison on her part while in the book its states clearly the fact she carefully PLANNED on how to do it.  Like she thought of hanging herself, she thought of doing what she does in  the show,  she thought of driving the car off the cliff,  she thought of even shooting herself.  For three of them- she brushed off because she didn't want her parents or whomever found her to have the 'guilt' her Mom whom founds her in the show -does in the show.  Hannah literally wanted to make sure her parents thought it was an accident.  But the slit the wrists doesn't mean it look like an accident at all-but a last mintue hasty decision.     Oh and while I'm talking about the Netflix show- Why in the world, did they change Clay so much?  I mean in the book he was offered a rock by another character to throw at a third character's bedroom window but he refused too.  So to change that kind of person Clay is to someone whom takes a picture of that other person being in their private space?  That's SO not Clay.  And they didn't need to have Clay have issues and need medication- there were too many issues as there was!"  

 






Then it was time for Peer commutations class. We all had a bag to put notes in.  And the teacher had one as well if someone had something to discuss without sharing it in class.   Mrs. Ojo said "I got a note from someone whom apparently is in a bad place"  



she then shared the note with the class 





Some people said that if it was home life we could help them get counselling, or if it was grades we can help tutor them.    Charlene had the worst comment of all "Its like whomever wrote this note just wants attention  if they're serious they would have told us whom they were" 



That led me into another rant "So just because someone is down and tried to reach out to us for help is 
'wanting attention' ?  Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is a very real thing. I don't know whom wrote the note but some of HAM and my ancestors had this condition.  We don't know why they had it the parents and grandparents are keeping it from us but we do know they had it.   
'Whom had PTSD in the Swanson family you might ask?' "    


Well in the 2nd generation both our great-great-great Aunt Carly had it as did our Great-great-great grandpa Jacob.   In the 3rd Generation  great-great grandma America had PTSD for a bit and then eventually great-great grandpa did.    I believe that my late great grandma Elizabeth had PTSD after her experience with grandma's stepfather whom she later divorced and I also believe both Mom and Dad suffer PTSD as well for various reasons I don't know about.    


:"So for someone asking for help is NOT a someone being an attenion hog which is what you were suggesting Charlene" 



When I got home I wrote a review of 13 Reasons why






                                                            13 Reasons Why  by Jay Asher 
 
                            In one night Clay listens to the cassette tapes of the 13 Reasons why his dead classmate, Hannah Baker, completed suicide. Clay's tape is the odd one out since Hannah doesn't blame him for what happened *THAT* night. He also travels around the town to places that are mentioned or connected to people on the tapes.
 
                     He learned that a house that he ran to *THAT* Night was Bakers' first house in this town-summer before Gr.9. They moved to a different one between then and Gr.11. And he also learns the the reason he ended up running unknowingly to the Bakers' old house was due to another incident of THAT Night. The story shows how one little bit of gossip can snowball into tragic consequences






*back to reality*


A couple of days later I was hanging out with friends 



and I got this strange call


the caller (whom I didn't recgonize their voice)  said "I need to go home right NOW"


I returned home and for some reason I had the urge to go upstairs to the main bathroom.  When I got to the bathroom I discover HAM unconscious in the bathroom with pill bottles near her


I tried to give her mouth to mouse but that


when that didn't work  I called 911 


When the paramedics were here Grandma and grandpa and Mom showed up and were freaked out.


Mom was very upset when she saw HAM on the stretcher not breathing. She climbed into the ambulance and started crying


She went with HAM to the hospital and when she got back,  Grandma gave her a hug 


The next day after school I went and vist HAM and she's in a very deep coma.. 






Friday, August 12, 2022

Interlude 7.2. Literary Romance


Dear diary    I'm so in love with LiterallyOwMuttl89




I even went to the library and in it sang a love song to LiterallyOwMuttl89  



I know you have read a lot of books 



So I thought I'd go and take a look 
and see what the fuss was about 

And pretty soon, I found out/That these stories that you love so well 
have a common happenstance
I guess you could say I just fell 
for literature's perception of romance



I want to be the Ron to your Hermione 


The Harry to your Ginny



If you be Jane Bennet to my Mr. Bingley 

Or Elizabeth to my Darcy 



Maybe its foolish of me to think/
that the two of us have a chance
But I want to have a literary romance 





I have read the story of the Oddesy 

and how Odysseus' Penople 

Despite how Gods forced him to 



roam 

Waited for him to 



return home 



To love, in a world run amuck 

Cupid and Psyche 


Henry and Clare 

but not Bella and Edward ... cause that just sucks

I want to be the Pudge to your Alaska 

but without the whole dying thing


I want to be the Lancelot to your Guinevere 

but without cheating on the King



Let the Naysays have their say


But I don't want to hear "Won't's" and can't's" 







I want to have a literary romance.






The Fyero to your Elphaba 

The Perseus to your Andromeda
 


The Colin to his non-Katherine 


or the Q to the Margo Roth Spiegleman  



and you say "Don't this can't end well" 




And it's possible I'm crazy as hell 



But I have read too many books you see 


My expectations are not grounded in reality 


I'd know I would like us to take the place of Percy Jackson and Annabeth Chase



Because you see in the storybook world, the guy usually gets the girl 
Making a fictional romance last in the real world that's the trick
like Hebe with Hercules (after he passed) 

or Robert Langdon with take your pick






I want to be Lysander to your Hermia


(no faeire magic the real thing)



But I wouldn't be Romeo to your Juliet I want more then an angsty fling 


and you mght think this is just a game, 


That I just want to get into your pants 


But I really want an literally romance 



But I really want an literally romance 

But I really want an literally romance 

But I really want an literally romance 

But I really want an literally romance 




_______________________
Song is by Matt Guion aka Bandgeek8408